The Poop Run

So Brett and I have been dealing with this phenomenon for a little over a year now. The Poop Run is what Billie Jean does when she needs to go #2. This dog will run over a block before finding the right place to go. She's also pretty private so this "spot" also cannot be within 15 feet of another person, dog or running car. If she sees a person, dog or a moving/running car the Poop Run must start from the beginning. Some nights we could spend 20 minutes running after this dog looking at her butt waiting for something to happen. The spot must also be hidden and also "perfect". Usually a "perfect" spot is on top of leaves, in between the curb and a car, hidden behind a house or down a scary alley. Pooping on top of snow is pretty difficult. A new method is to run back and forth across a snowy area to create a private divot in which to poop. That works pretty well.

I haven't asked but I'm pretty sure that the dog walker wants to murder my dog everyday when she is dragging her around attempting to poop. I'm afraid that if I ask I might get slapped by a neon blue poop bag she has in her hand.

The Poop Run has caused more than one problem before. Due to our dog's private bathroom needs she sometimes runs away from the park area to do her business. God forbid Oscar, Roxanne, Sadie or Birch see her poop. She'd never be able to live it down. When my dog is running away other dogs find it perfectly acceptable to go within inches of my feet. Me, well I'd rather a dog with some discretion but her private pooping is a little out of control. I think she might actually get embarrassed if someone/dog sees her pooping. Her head darts around like she's trying to hide and then gives me death looks like I was supposed to stop traffic while she is going.

The dog has issues. I have like 10 more years of the Poop Run in my future. Wish me luck.